Why Honking Is the Worst

Lessons from a one year old...CALM DOWN!

It's a sound we recognize from infancy. One we've come to expect as a society if we live in a well populated area, and for some reason, contrary to how we should feel, it is just an accepted form of background noise in our big cities. I am, as my title would suggest, referring to honking, and I would like to propose that a shift away from this noise polluting action. In fact, I will go so far as to say that the act of honking a car horn is, for lack of a more mature term, the WORST!

Imagine, for a moment, that I'm walking behind you. I'm in a rush, needing to pick up my children, meet a friend, or some other activity that is of no consequence to you and your day. You are also off somewhere, but are walking at a slower pace and I am unable to pass you without bumping into you. Instead of waiting till a path clears, I yell "Hey!". Inevitably, I will startle you, and in all likelihood, your natural reaction will be to yell back, and we will likely exchange a few choice words before going about our day. Passers by will certainly have questions about my mental stability for having yelled at a stranger, and we'll both be angry and miserable for the rest of our journey. Sounds pretty awful, right?

Now put yourself in a car in front of me, same situation, but instead of yelling, I honk at you. Is you're reaction any different? Probably not. The act of honking a car horn is the equivalent to yelling incoherently at someone. When someone honks their horn, the person for whom that honk is intended is frequently unaware they're doing anything wrong, if they are at all. There is a very negative reaction to honking as well, even if the intention is solely to get someones attention. If you are the one being honked at, the reaction is typically to get angry, wave your hands around, and occasionally show someone the finger. The kicker is, neither you or the person honking at you are having an intelligent conversation, and are doing no more than making obscure, angry gestures at each other, accomplishing very little other than leaving both parties rattled being the wheel.

Honking is also incredibly distracting. When I'm crossing the street on bike or on foot, and someone honks, whether at me or someone else on the road, I inevitably slow down and look to see what's going on. Let's think about that for a moment. I am in the middle of the road, stopped and looking around for the disgruntled driver. Is that really a good idea? The easy answer is no, but I, and I'm sure most people, inevitably do it. Because our automatic response is that horn is intended for us, and, at least for me, I have an obligation to tell that person to stop being an impatient dickhead. So instead of being focused on remaining safe in the road, I am now in the midst of car traffic, around other road users who have also been distracted by the loud honking, everyone trying to figure out who's at fault, and no one really paying attention to what they should be...the road and others on it.

Further to honking being distracting, it can be quite terrifying, especially for our most fragile road users - pedestrians and cyclists. If you've ever ridden a bike in a larger city, you've likely had that moment when you're travelling along, minding your own business, and out of no where someone honks, you are startled and your heart begins to race. But hey, we're adults, we can handle it and recover quickly enough, right? Kids, on the other hand, aren't always so lucky. Nearly six years ago, while out discovering our city with our then toddler aged daughter, we were walking along without a care in the world, when suddenly a large vehicle honked. Our daughter was instantly startled, tripped and fell face first onto the sidewalk. She managed to cut her lip pretty badly, and was obviously in tears, both scared and hurt. And why was that guy honking? Because the person in front of him was turning left and waiting patiently for the crossing to clear to do so. All he accomplished was making himself unnecessarily agitated and scaring a child so much she was left bleeding and with a fat lip. Let's all have a slow clap for that guy.

Don't get me wrong, honking has its place from time to time, mainly in cases when another driver is being dangerous and risking lives. But the number of times I'm out and about and someone honks at another driver simply because they have stopped to allow me to cross the road is astounding. It serves no purpose in that situation other than to agitate everyone involved. It's just another case of society needing to take a moment and clam down. Yes, we're all busy people with hectic lives, but no one person's needs outweigh the needs of those around them. So, to all the honk-happy people out there, take a breath, wait that extra second, and proceed with your day a little less agitated and maybe a bit happier knowing that you haven't left someone thinking you're nothing but inconsiderate fool.

I am not "every cyclist"

Once upon a time, I was on my bike, picking up my son from daycare. While travelling along a dedicated bike route, I came to a traffic circle, slowing down to be sure to check for cross-traffic. All of a sudden, a motorist approaching the circle decided it would take too much time to drive around the traffic circle as is mandated by law, so they turn left by cutting me off. I was frustrated with this motorists lack of respect for the law, but thankful that I am a cautious cyclist and didn't just rush through the intersection. Moral of the story: some drivers behave badly.

This account actually happened to me just yesterday, but this is the first anyone will hear about it. It's likely no one ever would had I not been inspired to write this post. The fact is that every day I'm out in the city, whether on foot, bike or the occasional car, drivers all around me behave badly. From speeding, running stop signs, talking on cell phones or any other myriad of offences, I would surely have dozens of stories to share each day.

There are cyclists who behave badly, too. I know, I encounter them on my travels as well, and could go on about their offences near as much as I could about motorists. But for the most part, I don't. Thankfully, though, since I am an avid bicyclist, I have become the go-to for every motorist complaint about people on bikes. Yes, that statement was dripping with sarcasm, but it has become the norm for me, sadly. Whenever anyone finds out that I ride a lot, I must endure tales of cyclists "taking the lane on a two lane road", rolling through stop signs and red lights, riding erratically on busy streets, or any other number of complaints.

Well, enough is enough. I am not responsible for the poor behaviour of my two-wheeled counterparts, in as much as my mother, for example, is not responsible for every bad thing a driver has ever done simply because she gets behind the wheel of a car to get around. In fact, I'm pretty sure if I sat down with my mother and moaned incessantly about the silly things drivers do, asking her why "THEY" do things like that, she would be hurt that I had lumped her in a category of people she doesn't deserve to be in. When I get on a bike and set off to my destination, I do not assume the role of "every cyclist", nor do I deserve to be lumped into a broad and general group of people.

Lately, I have come to sit quietly and patiently for my motoring storytellers to finish their tales of encounters with cyclists. Why? Because my mother, that same woman who shouldn't have to hear my complaints about motorists, taught me if you can say anything nice, don't say anything at all. While some of the accounts I have heard do warrant frustration, many motorist complaints about people on bikes are based more on the fact that they have slowed them down rather than broken any laws. 

I was recently recounted a tale of a driver on a country road getting stuck behind a group of training cyclists. When that driver was finally able to pass the group, they honked angrily at the group, and various members of the peloton gave them the finger and yelled at the driver. This driver was astounded that the cyclists could be so rude, and questioned me as to why cyclists get so angry. At the time, I just shrugged, smiled, and went about my day. What I wanted to say was, "I'm sorry, but you're reaction was wrong. Those cyclists, while perhaps not dealing with the situation in the best way, were likely startled by your horn, and concerned about the car racing past them in an angry and dangerous manner." This is how I feel many of the times people regale tales of cyclist encounters, because many times, cyclists were doing nothing more than exercising their right to be on the road.

In general, people, regardless of their means of transportation, can behave badly. What's important is to remember that just because someone shares that means of transport, in my case, a bicycle, does not mean that they should be held accountable for the actions of everyone else who travels the same way. It really is just a means of respecting our peers. Maybe by keeping this in mind, we can start to work past this endless "battle" between cars and bikes. We're all just trying to get from point A to B in a safe and respectful manner.